missing something ?

missing the person you long for it might be one of the worst things imaginable however life is often unfair you just have to try and get past that feeling even if it isn't easy and then sometimes you find another way to solve the problem

once i was in cragden i just wanted to go and leave it all leave all the feelings and all the people behind go to some place unknown but i couldn't make it past a certain point

somebody came up to me it wasn't anybody i knew however she seemed to know me quite well she had to know me because she asked me : "missing something?" perhaps she had experienced the same too that was another possibility

this was all that mattered she made me think she made me go go out to the countryside away from all the crowdedness , all the noise of the city

i needed that peace then there was a lot i had to think about but somehow whenever i got to think about her i wanted to run run away from it all again

luckily there wasn't anywhere to go from where i was so i had to stay the pain was so unbelievable but still i tried to withstand it

at some point i must have fallen asleep at least i think i woke up from it it had been a dream or rather a nightmare i had dreamed about my future

i felt so dreadful afterwards however i knew then i had to change it if i wanted to live on and i was sure i did want to

so i went back i went directly to her and told her everything i put my future into her hands i had to trust her

© d wolschner
sept 1995
meinem liebsten vater, dafür dass er immer für mich da ist!